In our self-help society, the conventional wisdom is that you must control every aspect of your life to find success and happiness. What a shock, then, when so many people finally achieve the career goals they have worked so hard for over the years only to discover that the attainment of their goals didn’t bring them the happiness they anticipated.

Could the dissatisfaction be because our definition of success is faulty? Would we find true happiness in success if we evolved from a self-centered, worldly view of success to one that is more God-centered?

Living in a culture that worships at the altar of money, people can find it difficult to view success with God at the center. This is a critical point to fully comprehend, however. What God will reveal to us, if we listen to Him, is that true success is to love Him and to love others as He loves them. Success for a Christian is glorifying His life by the way we are living ours.

It can seem counterintuitive in modern Western culture to believe that by yielding to God, we can actually achieve greater success. The more control we give Him, the more He rewards us. If we listen to Him, He will show us that the only way to achieve this type of success is through humility. Humility is somewhat difficult to learn and to define, but when we see it in someone else’s life, we know it instantly. They live for the Lord and not for themselves.

To think about how to live in humility, one could think about the humility of a child. With that type of humility, we will be filled with child-like enthusiasm and be eager to be led and instructed by the Lord. With such an attitude, we will be teachable, moldable, and willing to change.

Humility is what brings the right balance into our lives. Instead of thinking that we can handle things without God, or feeling unworthy to walk with Him, we recognize that our life in Him is all His grace. When we have that right focus we are yielded to the Spirit and walking in a right relationship with God, and in turn, we grow more in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus.

A good way to think of it is to imagine God holding your hand, teaching you His ways as you walk beside Him. It takes the humility of a child to not get ahead of the Lord and to listen and to trust Him to set the right pace. It also takes humility not to lag behind Him and to remember that in His grace, He forgives our unfaithfulness and even forgets our transgressions as we come back to Him, and allow Him to continue to lead, guide, and direct us. God recognizes that this childlike quality of humility is not possible for us to develop on our own. When our hearts are hardened by our sinful reactions to life’s circumstances, we forget how to accept God’s helping hand. Yet the Lord welcomes us in our sorrow and repentance with open arms of love, and bestows upon us all the blessings reserved for His children. Once you have put your faith in Jesus as Lord, He is there to teach you what it means to live a life of humility as you purpose yourself to let Him take the wheel of your life.

If you are finding that despite your efforts to control every aspect of your life, you are not finding the happiness and peace you seek, the answer can be found in learning humility. By opening your heart to Jesus and walking with Him, and by turning your life over to Him, you can reach heights of success you never imagined.

Stuart Migdon discovered that his career pursuits left him empty. Upon accepting Jesus, his life turned around and he wrote about his experiences in his new book JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL: 7 Keys to a Transformed Life with God.

Probably the biggest question for all people, whether they believe in God or not, is why is there so much suffering in this world? This is a question that probably won’t ever be answered until we meet God in person. Many people have opinions, and I’d like to give mine here.

Why does it seem like God doesn’t want good things for me? Why wouldn’t he want me to have good health, and to be happy and safe? Why wouldn’t he want me to have enough income to pay my bills, help my kids with school, and go on a vacation once in a while? It doesn’t seem like these things are that much to ask for. I don’t think He’s that concerned with these things because there is something that is much more important to Him.

Dr. Larry Crabb is a best-selling author, counselor and psychologist. He’s written many popular books including “Inside Out”, “Finding God”, and “The Marriage Builder”. I’ve read some of his books and liked them, though the ones I read were really deep and kind of hard to digest.

Recently, I discovered another book by Dr. Crabb called “Shattered Dreams – God’s Unexpected Pathway to Joy”. I started reading it and I realized it was different than the others I’ve read by him. It was actually much easier to read, and I could tell from the writing style that this book was intimately important to him, that he had really lived what he was writing here.

The premise of this book is that joy and happiness are two distinctly different things. Most of us believe that the most important thing that we can have is happiness. Plenty of money, a loving spouse and obedient kids, good health, a good job, a nice house, etc. The list could be quite long. But my belief is that this isn’t necessarily what God wants for us.

The Bible says that God wants to give good things to his children, even more than we want to give good things to our children. So God obviously wants us to be happy, right? That could be true, and while He does want those things for us, if they get in the way of having relationship with Him then He’ll take the relationship every time. That’s where we will find true joy.

Sometimes God will let us experience pain and suffering so that we don’t become too satisfied with our current lifestyle. He also realizes that we can get very busy trying to maintain that “happy” lifestyle, and that will also limit the joy we will find by having relationship with Him. What happens when we experience this pain? Most of us will do whatever we can to get rid of it.

Larry Crabb tells us in “Shattered Dreams” that we need to experience that pain and not try to minimize it or turn away from it if we’re going to experience the joy that God desires us to have, and that we really hunger for in our hearts. This is no fun, but the bottom line is that’s it’s the only path to experiencing true joy. After reading this book, I believe that this is why God allows pain and suffering and why bad things happen to good people.

Jim Collins said in his book From Good to Great, “In building greatness, there is no single defining action, no grand program, no one killer innovation, no solitary lucky break, no miracle moment. Rather, the process resembles relentlessly pushing a giant, heavy flywheel in one direction, turn upon turn, building momentum until a point of breakthrough and beyond.”

According to Collins, the key to success is not giving up. This quote has ministered to me many times. I’m planting a church here in Moreno Valley, a desert community. Over the years I’ve come face to face with a very dry, desert-like spiritual atmosphere. We have more recently seen God move in a wonderful, fresh way-yet the exciting things have come after facing numerous struggles and disappointments.

I’m convinced, in fact, that one of the key reasons why 80% of church plants fail is because the church planter gives up too early.

I’m coaching one church planter in Texas who has been doing all the right things. He is a student of cell church ministry and is practically reaches out through social outreach and evangelisic activity. He’s also prioritizing prayer. He even recently had the opportunity to quit his day job to give himself wholeheartedly to church planting (God provided financially through other means). Yet, with all of his labors over a two to three year period, he has seen little tangible fruit.

I’ve been encouraging this church planter to keep sowing the seed and doing the right things. Yes, ministry is rough. Disappointments are part of the job description.

Prolonged discouragement that results in hopelessness is sin, however. God wants us to press ahead in the midst of trials, knowing that He’s using those very same trials to mold and shape us.

Didn’t Paul say the same thing in Galatians 6:9, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Keep turning the flywheel. It will begin to pick up its own momentum. Who knows, someday people might be calling you an overnight success. Little will they know. . . .

In what area (s) do you need to keep pressing on?

Probably the biggest question for all people, whether they believe in God or not, is why is there so much suffering in this world? This is a question that probably won’t ever be answered until we meet God in person. Many people have opinions, and I’d like to give mine here.

Most people want to be able to have money to pay for their kids college, enough to pay bills and go on vacation once a year. They want to be happy and not have problems. They want to have good health. I’m no different than everyone else. Doesn’t it make sense that God would want the same for us? I don’t think He necessarily does, because He wants more than that for us!

I’ve read many books by Dr. Larry Crabb, best-selling author, psychologist, and counselor, and while they are always excellent and insightful, most of the ones I’ve read have been kind of hard for me to follow, because they’re so intellectual. Some of the books he’s written are “The Marriage Builder”, “Inside Out”, and “Finding God”.

Recently, I discovered another book by Dr. Crabb called “Shattered Dreams – God’s Unexpected Pathway to Joy”. I started reading it and I realized it was different than the others I’ve read by him. It was actually much easier to read, and I could tell from the writing style that this book was intimately important to him, that he had really lived what he was writing here.

In “Shattered Dreams”, Dr. Crabb explains that happiness and joy are not the same thing, and although most of us want happiness, God actually knows that this isn’t the best for us. We believe that it’s important to have plenty of money, good health, a nice car or house, a happy family, and so forth.

God wants us to find joy in a different place – in relationship with Him. If you can achieve that relationship and still have the above-mentioned happiness, that’s great! I don’t think they are necessarily exclusive of each other. After all, God does want us to have good things. The Bible says “If you know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”.

However, quite often when we have the happiness, we either become content or we get so wrapped up in keeping that happiness intact that we don’t see the need to find the time for that relationship with God. It is in these times that God might allow some pain to come into our life to draw us closer to him. It’s at these times that many of us tend to do what we can to minimize that pain, basically because it hurts!

Dr. Crabb writes in “Shattered Dreams” that we need to feel that pain, which might include mourning and grieving, to encounter God. It’s only in the middle of these tribulations, and when we get through them, that we are able to find the true joy that we seek in our heart and that God wants us to have. While it’s not any fun to go through this pain, Larry asserts that this is the only way we will experience true joy. This, I believe, is the reason that God allows suffering and why bad things happen to good people.

Anger management classes are specially programmed courses for promoting personal and social life of an individual. It teaches us about the devastating effects that anger can cause and shows us the way to take this unwanted situation under control.

As its said, self help is the best help, the best way to help yourself is to do something of your own, to make the efforts to change things. Anger management is like a drug, it can help you fasten the seatbelt to your uncontrollable anger, but its you who is to take the drug as its prescribed. You need to practice the learning in your life. Otherwise anger management programs wont be able to help you.

Anger can damage a lot of relationships in moments, can create life tougher everyday. Most of the times when someone suffers from uncontrolled anger don’t realize that its because of him that, people surrounding him are suffering so much.

But that’s not all. This kind of temperament, uncontrolled and sudden anger can affect your health badly. Those who fly into anger so often have greater chance to be victimized by heart attacks, stroke, paralysis caused by stroke and so on. Those who have learned about the devastating affects of anger are certainly willing to control their anger rather than being controlled by the anger.

The destructive nature of these uncontrolled emotions needs no telling. Starting from the individual levels anger has affected social life as well as national and international life. Families torn apart, relationships ended in despise, friends turned into foes due to the uncontrolled rage. So, let not this happen to your life anymore.

One shouldn’t only be aware about controlling he emotions in him, but being he parents of a kid, or a part of the society we need to help the kids or the people around us as well. Anger that piles up in a kids mind is not negligible at all. These situations should be treated with care. A kid can get frustrated fro various incidents occurring around him, his the classroom, in playgrounds or at home. Parents should teach theirs children how to have control over their emotions.

To facilitate anger management one can take help of the coaching programs that are arranged with a view to helping people controlling their emotions. These classes make us aware about the bad sides of uncontrolled emotion that we hardly would have realized otherwise.

Controlling the anger not only helps the relationships but also benefits your health. It’s you, who is at the center of everything. So if its not for the rest of the world, its important for your own purpose that you need to have anger under strict control.